You know what I’m talking about… it was one of “those” runs.
The one where I end up in some weird argument with myself for the first 3 or 4 miles. I’ve got things that I normally have put neatly away (gels, water, MP3) popping out, getting lost, getting tangled.
I got too hot. I got too cold. I took off my jacket and tied and retied and then tucked it into my water belt.
It rained that gloppy rain. It was stupid cold. It was supposed to snow, but it didn’t. I had teenagers think it was funny to yell in my face as they passed.
I got lost even though I knew where I was going. This was due to the fact that my gear was all over the place and I looked up and didn’t realise the street I was on.
The little hour-long meditation track I listen to to get me outside of myself, the repetitive chanting and peaceful drumming… the music which usually settles me into a comfortable run and doesn’t allow me to walk…
It was really pissing me off.
I couldn’t warm up, couldn’t calm down, and couldn’t keep my stuff on me.
When I bent over to pick up the water bottle for the sixth time I realised I couldn’t feel part of my hand.
When I ran through Christ Church Meadow with gusts of wind and really freezing rain pelting me in the face I felt my energy being zapped from me.
But when I had to stop running and tuck my hands underneath my armpits because I couldn’t feel them anymore I knew officially:
THIS WAS NOT A GOOD TRAINING RUN.
And when I sat in the bath, feeling like knives were stabbing me as I had gone 12.68 miles in freezing rain and was warming up…
I remember why you have to train for a marathon.
Because if I hadn’t, and if I hadn’t run in other equally crap conditions in the past I wouldn’t have gone 12.68 miles in freezing rain.
I wouldn’t have made it past the threshold of my home.
The reason I went so far, fought through the emotional and physical difficulties is to train myself to push through. That, and all the people who have been so kind to support me in my quest for marathon #2.
So when you see that the weather is crap.
When people are being crap.
When your gear is acting like it is not only intelligent, but very angry.
One foot in front of the other, for as far as you can go.
You’re having one of “those” runs.
And you’ll only be stronger for it.