I can’t believe I’m writing this but… I am missing all the preparation for the marathon.
I’m missing the calculated mileage, the packing, the visualisation, the excitement. I’m finding myself upset that it’s all over. And even though I know that technically it isn’t, and that I should be enjoying my recovery period and thinking about what smaller races I would like to participate in, I am in a semi-mourning state.
I ran a really great race. As I work in software I had colleagues walking up and telling me that I was bang on with my slow-and-steady mileage. (Nothing like stats to excite a bunch of super geeks like us.) I couldn’t agree more. Marathons are tough and you have to strategise in order to keep your energy consistent. I achieved that. I was sore when it ended but outside of a stomach that has been a bit everywhere this week (including into the leftover Easter candy) and a bit of IT band twinge, I’m fine.
But mentally, I’m not.
Here’s the thing, I know this is part and parcel of distance races. I know that there are endorphin crashes and that you have to work through the recovery. In fact, the reason I’m writing this is just in case there are others out there wondering why they are sad about it all ending. Because this is one of the things that might happen and it’s normal. You aren’t alone, and yes, it can even happen to people who have been running for years.
Enough with the sad emojis that are littering this post. The way you recover is through kindness to yourself (and a bit of light exercise). So…
I did things that made me smile this morning:
- I updated my fundraising page with a massive photo of the medal to say thank you. (I exceeded my goal, yay!)
- I took a moment to donate to one of the marathon coaches from the National Autistic Society as a thank you for his race in 2017. He’s going to run mile 10 in honour of my brother, who is living his best life thanks to increased awareness for autism.
- I’ve spent this week parading the medal around and reflecting on the fact that I achieved something I never would have dreamed of.
- I signed up to Virtual Blerch this September so that I can design my favourite running course through Oxford that will mandatorily end in cake.
Oh, and for England, today’s weather looks like it may stay consistent with cold but sunny. If anyone has spent time in England during Bank Holiday weekends it is usually rainy and miserable so I’m taking a moment to give a shout out to Mother Nature for keeping it beautiful.
I know these blues will pass and soon I’ll be writing again about all manner of silly things on this blog. But I thought I would write a little about the things that people may not expect from running, that sometimes you can be sad. And that’s okay.